Questions from the Scripture text: With whom does the one in Proverbs 13:20a walk? What happens to him? Whose companion is he one in verse 20b? What happens to him? What pursues sinners (Proverbs 13:21a)? What shall be repaid to the righteous (verse 21b)? What does the good man leave to whom (Proverbs 13:22a)? What happens to whom else’s wealth (verse 22b)? How much food is where (Proverbs 13:23a)? What does lack of justice cause (verse 23b)? What is he man in Proverbs 13:24a failing to do? What sort of action is this toward his son? What does the man who loves his son do (verse 24b)? What does the righteous get out of eating (Proverbs 13:25a)? How about the wicked (verse 25b)?
To what end should we aim our parenting? Proverbs 13:20–25 looks backward to the sermon in last week’s midweek meeting. In these six verses of Holy Scripture, the Holy Spirit teaches us that we should live and parent as those who wish to be satisfied upon the Lord, forever.
In this little section, Proverbs 13:20-21 establishes the theme, and Proverbs 13:22-25 applies it, especially to what we do with our children, and especially through he image of hunger. One preliminary step to humbling ourselves under the wisdom of others is spending time with those who are wise (Proverbs 13:20), and the needfulness of receiving this instruction is immediately seen in Proverbs 13:21. Just as goodness and covenant love are hot on the heels of the believer in Psalm 23:6, the same verb tells us that evil is hot on the heels of sinners in Proverbs 13:21a. How very much we need wisdom! It is the difference between having an evil end and a good end (verse 21b).
And there are those whose end we have been especially assigned, by God’s providence, to care for: our children and our children’s children. Proverbs 13:22 teaches not so much a principle (that the good should try to leave an inheritance to children’s children) as a generalized fact (that, ordinarily, godliness is met with multi-generational blessing). Of course, this wealth is especially spiritual—as we remember, from earlier in the chapter, that God Himself (and the righteousness necessary for right relationship with Him) is true riches. This should be the godly’s aim, and hope, for his children and children’s children.
This is why the godly will not leave his children to themselves, or to other children. If, indeed, rod-demanding folly is bound up in their hearts (Proverbs 13:24, cf. Proverbs 22:15), then two things are true. First, the godly ought not to seek “peer groups” for their children and youth. This is to consign them to the fate of the companion of fools: destruction. Let parents instead be their children’s companions, and let them seek for their children other mature believers to be companions. In such good, multigenerational company, children of parents who are pursuing the same biblical wisdom for them may grow safely together in wisdom, stature, and favor with God and with men. Second, the godly must not only employ the rod, but do so instantly. Like their child’s life depends upon it (Proverbs 13:20, cf. Proverbs 22:15, Proverbs 23:13–14). This is what love does, when so much is at stake (Proverbs 13:24b)!
In the alternating verses (Proverbs 13:23, Proverbs 13:25), the reality and metaphor of hunger is used to illustrate the whole of godliness from the part of diligence. Those poor in Proverbs 13:23 are poor because neither have they been diligent to work their ground (verse 23a), nor have they been good stewards of what it produced (verse 23b). Untrained children exhibit this exact laziness and wastefulness. And, the parent sees in it a glimpse of what their children may be. Notice the imbalance in the contrast in Proverbs 13:25. The difference between the righteous and the wicked can be seen even in their area of focus. For the righteous, it is his soul that he seeks to see satisfied—and it will be (verse 25a)! For the wicked, his stomach is his focus (cf. Philippians 3:19), but even that will always feel like it is needing more (Proverbs 13:25b). The godly desire, for themselves and for their children and children’s children, to have everlastingly satisfied souls!
Who are your companions? Who are your children’s companions? What might change in your disciplining (or your being disciplined), if it was done like your life depends on it? How diligent are you in satisfying your stomach? How diligent are you in satisfying your soul?
Sample prayer: Lord, thank You for being our good Father, Who gives us both the instruction that we need and the discipline that we need. Grant that we might walk with those wise, with whom we too will become wise, and have our souls satisfied in You, we ask through Christ, AMEN!
Suggested songs: ARP1 “How Blessed the Man” or TPH119B “How Shall the Young Direct Their Way?”